Are we really living in a democracy? We think not. Pahlaj Nihalani, the CBFC Chairman, has declared that merely a ticker saying ‘smoking/alcohol is harmful to health’ is not enough anymore. “We feel the superstars who are followed by millions and who  set an example in societal behaviour must not be shown drinking or smoking on screen unless  the provocation for doing so is really strong,” he said. 

By this logic, some of the greatest gems in Indian cinema wouldn’t happen. 

Devdas

The whole of Devdas is about drinking, so the entire film will be banned. There’ll be no SRK screaming “Objection Overruled!” in a drunken state. There’ll be no bromance between Dev and Chunni Babu, because well, their relationship was built on alcohol. 

No Smoking

Even though the film title is about the prohibition of smoking, John Abraham is seen sporting the cancer stick in a majority of scenes. Anurag Kashyap had a problem when the ticker was introduced, we shudder to think the rage he must be feeling now. 

Sholay 

Well, a pivotal scene (and a famous one) where Dharmendra (Veeru) threatens to jump from a height, if Hema Malini (Basanti) refuses to hold his hand, will be cancelled. Then there is the dancing on the glass scene (from broken wine bottles), which will also be canned. 

Amar Akbar Anthony

Every Keshto Mukherjee Film

PS: Johnnie Walker would just be banned, because his name would have to be blurred out every single time according to the rule.