Once upon a time, long long ago, a man only cared about his razor, shaving cream and a deodorant to hide the stench of cigarettes. While we are happy that men have started grooming themselves better, some of these grooming fads border on what-the-heck-were-you-thinking. We select the jaw-dropping best.

Vampire Facials

No, it is not as scary as it sounds. The dermatologist draws out a few spoonfuls of your blood, spins it in a centrifuge to separate the plasma and injects the concentrated plasma (which is rich in platelets) back into your face, with the help of a dermapen – a tool which contains several acupuncture-like needles — which drive the plasma into the deepest layers of the skin, making it smoother, cleaner and firmer. Its popularity went through the roof after Kim Kardashian got it done on her show. In India, VLCC is offering the service.

Cryotherapy

Seen those guys jumping naked into ice pools in Russia? Well, Cryotherapy comes close, because your whole body is exposed to temperatures ranging between -130 °C and -150 °C for 3 minutes in a Cryochamber. This rapid cooling causes the blood to flow to the most vital organs, in order to relay more oxygen and nutrients. Upon exiting the Cryochamber, less-toxic blood flushes back into the rest of the body. This is also an effective method of weight loss, because you burn 800 calories in 3 minutes. Alchemy in Mumbai is the only fitness centre to offer this therapy.

Snake Massages

Increasingly popular in Israel, Russia and Indonesia, fat pythons are cleaned and dried and allowed to slither over your body. A session is expected to relieve sore muscles and migraines. Hopefully you will emerge alive.

Elephant Massages

In Thailand, for a few good bahts, you can get a nice pat down by an elephant. Yes, we’re serious. A blanket is draped over your back, and baby elephants or adults (according to your pressure preference) proceed to use their feet and trunk to massage you. If you don’t have recurring nightmares of being trampled to death after that, we’ll pay you good money.

Ramen Baths

This is our worst nightmare coming true. In some spas in Japan, you can sit in community bath tubs stewing in pork and noodle broth. Why? To up your collagen levels and improve your metabolism. Why can you not just eat it, rather than be cooked in it? We have no idea.